Another One Bites The Dust

 Last week whilst everyone was preparing for the Rugby I was getting ready for yet another Wedding. Yay me. Yet another reminder that I’m in the minority when it comes to the prospects of nuptials.

Don’t get me wrong, I fully intended to go and watch what I, foolishly, thought would be the humiliation of the Ozzies but first I had to do the wedding dance first.
Yes, the bride does look lovely. Yes, I should find me a decent girl to settle down with. No, these chancers won’t fool me. Yes, One of these days I will also be standing up there shitting my pants realising I may have made a monumental mistake. Uhuh, nod, smile, sip. Fuck it. Gulp.

This time the lucky oke is someone I went to school with and it made me realise how much we’ve all changed. Not just physically, which btw came as quite a shock- how is possible that men gain so much weight after finding their “life partner”? – But also the sudden maturity that comes out of nowhere. Guys who wouldn’t think twice about getting supremely wasted and doing asinine things like mooning a couple of pensioners are now behaving like… ADULTS!!!!

I read somewhere that more and more South Africans are deciding to take the plunge and tie the knot. It also says that although the divorce rate had decreased most divorces resulted from first marriages. Hmm… And just to make me feel better, more men are getting married later in life. So I’m not completely alone after all.

Anyway, left the church and went to Rugby which was a waste of time but still drank with a couple of mates from Oz ( yes migration in reverse does occur occasionally), having to admit that we were thrashed royally.

This weekend I’m off the hook as there are no weddings but there is a major Bday coming up and there are heavy hints of a possible proposal… can’t wait  😦

L

Stilte

I’m really enjoying the quiet that is my office environment at the moment. Everyone is away at some workshop and because I decided to take a day off last week I was lucky enough to miss out on going. Poor sods.

There is something weirdly comforting about the calm that is the office with only the hum of my PC and 5fm to keep me company. I’ve been here three hours now and already been on two smoke breaks and had coffee with the front desk girl. And I manged to do 40% of my work for today. Its amazing what can be done without any distractions.

The quiet has also allowed me to clear my head and put things into perspective. I’ve written down everything I’m struggling with and formulating possible solutions. So I now know exactly whats going on and what need to be done. Its all been in my head but I guess my brain’s been oxygen starved due to hyperventilating and could not function properly.

G arrived last night with a couple of bottles of wine and put things into perspective. We had a long chat, reminisced about the good old days in Cape Town, cried about the fact that we are indeed growing up and then watched the Olympics (good luck Nhlapo) and had a parents slamming contest when we decided that if it werent for them (the parents) we could also be gold medal winning, globe trooting, endorsement having (?) icons.

Then we switched over to Oprah and once again I’ve decided that in my next life I want to be either Steadman or Gail King. Or the kid that Oprah never had. G wanted to be Joan of Arc. Anyway I digress. Oprah’s being doing a lot of “lala” things lately, along with the usual giving. I blame this on that new age book she’s been punting.

Like any decent fan I got a copy of Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth. I had a friend of mine that works in a book store secure me a copy. There were none left and the staff were holding aside that one copy to be read amongst themselves. Regarding the Book: I’m not a fan. Its just like when she tried plugging the secret. I’m really not into that whole “you design your own destiny” shit. And I think Oprah is slowly losing the plot. All that money has gone to her head. She should relieve herself of it and donate some to an almost needy, almost kid in Africa, i.e. me. But it does make for entertaining viewing.

Anyway back to the silence… I’m listening to my song of the moment and trying to enjoy every second coz who knows when an opportunity like this may come around again.

Eeuww!!!

I do not have OCD nor am I really germ conscious. I don’t care that there are more germs on your toothbrush than the actually toilet seat or stuff like that but this mail got me thinking. I’m one of those people who never hold on to the railing on an escalator and I never touch the doors to a restroom with my hands after I’ve washed them. Coz Some people do not wash after tinkling and touch that very same spot.

This piece emailed to me also touched on one of my pet peeves: pets in trolleys. Aside from the fact that I am not particularly fond of them I find it highly offensive when I see little animals poking their heads out of shopping trolleys. I don’t care how clean you claim your animal to be the fact is they’re filthy animals occupying a space where someone else’s food will be.

Shopping Trolleys are dirtier than public toilets – fact!

Most off the major chain Stores (Hyper Checkers, Pick n’ Pay, Woolies and Spar) now have Trolley wet wipes to disinfect your trolley at the door before Putting your kids and food in.

Thousands of different shoppers touch the same trolley each day.

Investigations on 120 items found in public areas, commonly touched by hands, were examined for bacteria and viruses, shopping trolleys were the worst of the worst! More so than escalator conveyors, public toilets, lift buttons, train and bus straps!!!!

Although most people are aware of the importance of hand washing less than 45% of people bother to wash them – (this is an international statistic!)

The high bacteria count found on the average clean looking trolley is enough to make you sick, a survey carried out in the United States revealed that the average shopping trolley contains 1000times the bacteria count that a human would otherwise encounter in a normal day. – Baby seats have even worse statistics!

In Australia a 2 year old child spent several weeks in hospital in an intensive care unit with her life hanging in the balance, after extensive investigation, health department inspectors traced the source (of infection) to a supermarket shopping trolley, the child rode in the cart sucking her thumb while her mother shopped, the bacteria on the handle wound up in her mouth!

Even if a shopping trolley looks clean it may be laden with germs that can sicken you or your child!

But what are the chances??? – Dr Reynolds a microbiologist at the University of Arizona doing research to determine why certain bacteria find their way into people’s homes, made a startling discovery: one in five shopping trolleys tested positive for bodily fluids – blood, saliva or urine – that could transmit germs.

In Oklahoma City a concerned Eyewitness news presenter – Kevin Sims and his crew were horrified at the outcome of the shopping trolley bacteria investigation that they carried out, however they found a solution to the high bacteria counts…

When the stores bought in anti-bacterial wipes to use on the trolleys the bacteria count quickly disappeared. – According to Sideman’s lab tests, a simple, in- expensive cleaning wipe took a bacterium count in the thousands to almost zero – in a matter of seconds!

Most Pick n Pay stores and Spar stores in South Africa now provide FREE Sani-touch surface wipes for use on trolley handles, and hand wipes in store for your convenience!

USE THEM THEY ARE FREE!

For the protection of you and your family.

On Being Emo.

I’m sure some of you that read my entries will have come to the assumption that I’m a bit emotional.

Its not rue. I rarely show genuine emotion. I’m a fun guy and am always in the mood for fun but some days just get harder than others. Those are the days when I wish that I was a bank teller or that I was married to some rich sugar mommy on the verge of croaking due to a terminal illness but still hot looking and lived on an island 6 months of the year.

Some others that may have read my previous post only will have come to the conclusion that the word FUCK is part of my vocabulary. This is also untrue. I hardly ever use the word FUCK. Just when I’m really FUCKING angry. Or Upset. So maybe I do use the word a lot. doesnt matter.

I’ve decide to take a week off and sort out my shit and maybe take up yoga or something.

Freaking Out. Just A Little.

This is the fucking second time I’m typing this freaking post so bare with me. It was so good the first time round. according to me.

I’m freaking out. Again. And not in a good way. I’ve been really busy lately with work. I’m not one to usually stress over work and worry what other people may think. I’m not one of those anal retentive people that wants everything to be perfect in order to impress someone that does not even appreciate your efforts.

I guess I’m feeling unmotivated, really overworked and ridiculously underpaid. But I’m assured that its the way everyone feels. Erm, Thanks? Good to know!! My stress has begun manifesting itself and is showing on my face -literally. I’m breaking out due to stress!!! WTF?!!! This hasn’t happened since Highschool.

I’ve grown accustomed to taking the easy way out when under immense stress but I’ve learnt those things are bad for me (they’re bad for me, they’re bad for me, they’re bad for me… ) so now I have to find alternative means to destress. Gym is redundant, I’ve given up smoking and sex is infrequent so… I’m at a loss.

And then to top it all, and because life sucks majorly and wants to drive me to heavy drink, I find out that I may not graduate. I MAY NOT GRADUATE!! I MAY NOT FUCKING GRADUATE!!!! What. The. Fuck?!!!

*freaks out calmly*

Its cool. Anybody have a cigarrette? Fuck, give me some sleeping pills rather. I DO NOT need this shit right now. I need to resort to plan B. I can fix this. Always have a plan B. I have a plan B.

Any suggestions for a Plan B?  C?